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Robert

Roman

Empire

RED BRICK ALLEY STORIES

The Killards Are Coming

Every damn day in Religion Class, Sister Anna Banana yapped about the Soviets revving up to start a nuclear war with the new president, Ronald Reagan. She said after the cities burned to Holy Hell, there’d be something called “nuclear winter” that would kill all... 

Double-Strength Demon Dogs

Fantastic Freddie was the only altar boy from the Red Brick Alley. He was always consecrating Ritz Crackers and trying to make us eat them like communion wafers. He light-fingered incense from the sacristy, and he blessed water from Old Lady Tully’s spigot...

Laser Loop

I couldn’t see over the tall green school bus seat except when we hit a pothole and I bounced up in the air like a Pop-Tart jumping out of a toaster. Nobody at Saint Augie’s could believe I was allowed to go. My first school picnic ever. I was good from the day I handed in my pink...

The Boy Wonder

How the Hell did Jaggerbush get himself up there? He was clawing his way up into the open window above the Science class door like a real-life gargoyle. The blockhead of a wooden mallet stuck out of the back of his Toughskins where his butt crack was. He wore three...

About The Author

Rob.jpg

Robert Roman grew up in Pittsburgh, PA, where he sold newspapers to cars from a concrete island. Read more→

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My Own Private Ulysses: One Cheat Day

  • Writer: Robert Roman
    Robert Roman
  • 1 day ago
  • 1 min read


One Cheat Day

 

On one honey heated Thursday in June,

Fast we all roam to eat sweets and not yield.

While they call our feast day junk food, jejune,

With their fast zeal, treats remain unrevealed.

We follow Bloom’s plunge through every slow street,

While bedsheets back home throe under the plunder

Of one unsated foe’s stately plump meat,

Who snakes the wife’s pipes like a pro plumber.

Diets command caloric restriction,

But when the heat of one euphoric pair

Cools off, duty demands dereliction.

So, pare down cold fare and dare an affair.

Old Bloom does mix up love with food in one mash.

His wish: fix up a new dish, one down to smash.

 

 

Stay tuned for more sugary sonnets.

Same hankering time, same hanky-panky channel.

 
 
 
© 2016 by Robert Roman - Red Brick Alley
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