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Robert

Roman

Empire

RED BRICK ALLEY STORIES

The Killards Are Coming

Every damn day in Religion Class, Sister Anna Banana yapped about the Soviets revving up to start a nuclear war with the new president, Ronald Reagan. She said after the cities burned to Holy Hell, there’d be something called “nuclear winter” that would kill all... 

Double-Strength Demon Dogs

Fantastic Freddie was the only altar boy from the Red Brick Alley. He was always consecrating Ritz Crackers and trying to make us eat them like communion wafers. He light-fingered incense from the sacristy, and he blessed water from Old Lady Tully’s spigot...

Laser Loop

I couldn’t see over the tall green school bus seat except when we hit a pothole and I bounced up in the air like a Pop-Tart jumping out of a toaster. Nobody at Saint Augie’s could believe I was allowed to go. My first school picnic ever. I was good from the day I handed in my pink...

The Boy Wonder

How the Hell did Jaggerbush get himself up there? He was clawing his way up into the open window above the Science class door like a real-life gargoyle. The blockhead of a wooden mallet stuck out of the back of his Toughskins where his butt crack was. He wore three...

About The Author

Rob.jpg

Robert Roman grew up in Pittsburgh, PA, where he sold newspapers to cars from a concrete island. Read more→

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Robert Roman

My Own Private Ulysses: Why Try Poetry?



Why Try Poetry?


Why James Joyce? That fight will just have to wait

For some other too soon happy hours.

One quatrain’s too slight for such stout debate.

Some brawls last past the hour Guinness sours.

First round, I punched up the formal essay,

Nothing too stiff, but strange, looping, and light.

The ref bounced me out to the alleyway.

Management barred me and sneered nighty-night.

From their dive they jeered and cheered my exile

With chins too week for my meek and mild prose.

Take a dive just to thrive? Not my style.

I asked, where’s no-holds-barred, anything goes?

Poetry’s what you can get away with.

So, now I juice on James Joyce and plead the fifth.

 

 

Subscribe and stay tuned for more eighty-sixed sonnets.

Same tuned-up time, same chin-down channel.



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